(How Not To) Lookbook

In the words of Kate Bush, “You’re just a skinny bitch, who forgot to eat.”

I love Vogue.com’s weekly Ten Best Dressed. I read it every week, just like my obsession with postsecret. But…

Anna Wintour.

Vogue’s editor-in-chief is notorious for not liking anyone fat. And by “fat” I mean boney. Most of these lists are flooded with stick figure women, who barely fill out the dress. I was upset when a few months ago, they had Taylor Momsen number one on the best dressed list for the crimson Marchesa gown she wore to the Metropolitan Opera’s 125th Season Opening Night Gala, the night that a lot of the entertainment industry gasped at how skinny Taylor had become.

Then, on this week’s list, the coveted number two slot went to Jennifer Connelly in the Balmain sequined cocktail she wore to the LA opening of “He’s Just Not That Into You.” Once again, blogs were flooded with comments on Jennifer’s stick figure, in comparison to the broad shoulder dress (I did love the look, but damn that girl has twiggy legs).

Now, I know that Anna Wintour doesn’t chose the weekly lists, but this is her company. Wintour is such a fucking bitch in my book. It’s not often you hear anyone singing the praises of this cunt. She is an infamously cold hearted bitch (The Devil Wears Prada), and she glorifies eating disorders, if you ask me. Not only is she a terrible person, but she is a FUR HAG as well!!! Who wears fur?? Sluts like Wintour who will burn in a fiery hell someday (ok, that was mean, I just really hate fur hags). I love Vogue, I was happy to be in an issue of Vogue (sorry, shameless self promotion!), but I refuse to subscribe to her magazine.

As for her free weekly best dressed lists… I’ll read those.

Especially for having Drew B. in the Lanvin she wore to the (insanely long movie name) premiere, as well. Loved the dress like crazy.

Anyways, see for yourself- the constant string of skinny #1’s, and look for the fur and bones.

Wintour, you can lick it.

Ok, What’s Up Bitches!?

Sorry, I have totally taken a backseat- hard core. But I have so much to bitch about and clothes sharing, and what not.

The first most awesome thing for me to point out is that I, sadly, don’t have time to do it tonight. But tomorrow- I WILL update you.

I’m writing it down as we speak.

Peace, sluts!

I am going to be mean for a moment.

Cankles.

Bitches, look at your ankles. I want you to stand in front of a mirror and really, really study them.

I want you to look at pictures of what ankles should look like.

I want you to compare them to yours.

Next, I want you to go through your closet and toss all of your skinny leg capris (because not only do you have cankles, but it’s 2 degrees outside).

Go through your shoes. Ankle strapped stilettos need to go… now.

I say this out of love.

If you have cankles, you cannot pull any of the aforementioned looks off. It draws the attention to your flaw. And who wants to be known as the cankles girl??

Not me.

Your friend (that is, only once you throw out those items),

Non-Cankles.